My mom Cate’s an old hand when it comes to being an octogenarian. She’s been one for a while now. But Cate turning 85 in May wasn’t just another birthday. It was a milestone worthy of not just one but three celebrations, each separate in temperament, but all equal in gravity.

The first party was low-key: a small lunch at Spring Lake Village May 25th with mom, Monica, my uncle Charlie and aunt Ellen O’Malley, my sister Anne Marie, and myself. It’d been five years–mom’s 80th birthday, actually–since I last saw Charlie and Ellen, and I was looking forward to seeing them. Charlie had a rough 2016, health-wise, and he wasn’t moving as spryly as he once had. But he looked good. He could still tell a story. He still had that great laugh. He was still uncle Super. Ellen, unsurprisingly, still hadn’t aged, and hasn’t for about 20 years.

The O’Malleys gifted mom a 1929 Chicago Street Directory  that included the town in which her family grew up, Wilmette. That lead to a few childhood recollections from both mom and Charlie (an octogenarian himself), including one featuring a fearless 13 year-old Cate O’Malley ice skating down a 60-foot toboggan run. “She was the talk of the town for that winter season,” Charlie recalled. My mom, the X-Gamer–who knew?

Charlie O’Malley recalls the daring-do of his sister Cate, circa 1945.

Lunch wrapped quickly after that. The O’Malleys had a bridge tournament to get to. And Cate had to rest up for her second birthday bash of the day at the Alcocers’ home later that afternoon. She and Anne Marie hopped in an awaiting golf cart driven by an SLV staffer, gave a “royal wave” to Monica and I, and drove off into the distance.

Mom reappeared late that afternoon at Mary’s place for another informal birthday gathering: a dinner of Round Table pizza with all us kids–Mary, Anne Marie, myself, and Mark–along with Monica and Mary’s husband, Tony. Mary presented mom with a double-cut, personal-sized, sausage pizza as we all sang (off-key) “Happy Birthday.” Pizza for a rare family gathering was a quintessential Sweeney move. Most folks might have gone out and celebrated at a place like John Ash & Co. Even Monica couldn’t help but wonder aloud about the fact us Sweeneys were commemorating our mother’s 85th birthday with a pizza party. It’s just the way we roll, I explained. And it’s what Cate wanted most: to celebrate her family with her family in an intimate setting.

Besides, there was a the third, more grand party yet to come.

The celebration two days later at the Alcocer home capped mom’s turning 85. It included the usual suspects of kids and grandkids, and a newly minted great-granddaughter. Anne Marie’s son Bryce couldn’t make it. But her new beau, Joe was there, along with his two daughters and mother. Our aunt Karen O’Malley–uncle Jim’s wife–and their daughter, my cousin Kim O’Malley and her husband Armando were also there. It was as much a family reunion as it was a birthday celebration.

Also attending was longtime (nearly 50 years) family friend Dorothy Duncan.  Dot was in fine form, too. She showed off an encyclopedic recall of just about anybody who lived in the Shadow Hills Estates neighborhood from 1968 to the mid-1990s and what most of those individuals were up to in the present day.

The birthday girl gets a birthday serenade.